If you’ve ever…
- Been told you hurt an employee’s feelings
- Barked out a directive in the heat of a busy moment
- Declared a mandate based on your discovery of an error
- Been so overwhelmed that you snapped at a team member
…you’ve probably failed to use your good Emotional Intelligence, your EQ, skills. We’ve all been there. Unfortunately, once you’ve said it, the other person can’t unhear it. And it’s really hard, if not impossible, to repair the damage done to the other person.
Fortunately we can improve our EQ.
The key outcome of solid EQ is deep and abiding relationships
If you don’t want to be turning people over regularly and struggling to maintain consistency, then EQ will go a long way to retaining your best people. A leader with good EQ will cause people to care and to work hard for you. It also helps you deepen personal relationships, which sometimes can be a real challenge for a business owner because of the time and energy you may be putting into your business.
EQ is your ability to identify and understand emotions
…in yourself first and then in others. Then it’s using that awareness to manage yourself and your socialness. We chose these 14 practical, not frou-frou ways to improve your EQ.
How to improve your self-awareness
- Observe the ripple effect. Take note of how your outbursts affected the other person.
- Know what triggers you. List the people, situations, and words that tend to set you off.
- List your strengths, weaknesses, likes, and dislikes and be OK with them all. Play into your strengths and likes and with your weaknesses, just make sure they’re not derailing you.
How to improve your self-management
- Count to 10. Emotions DO have a shelf life. Let things settle, wait a few minutes or sleep on it.
- Think of someone who’s good at self-management then use them as a sounding board and ask them for advice.
- Replace negative self-talk, like “it’s all their fault,” “she always does this!” or “I’m an idiot” with “I made a similar mistake once” or “What can we learn from this?”
How to improve your social-awareness
- Be fully present when interacting: listen without thinking of your what your response will be, watch the person talking and nothing else, don’t interrupt, and listen not only to words, but tone and what’s not being said.
- Read the person and read the room. Notice things about a person: extraverted or introverted, fidgety or calm, eye contact or eyes darting. Focus on observing details about people.
- If you’re unsure what’s going on with someone, observe what you’re noticing aloud. “You seem quiet, sad, excited. What’s going on?”
- Ask yourself, “If I were the person, how would I feel, what would I think, how would I respond?”
How to improve your social-management
- Use the small courtesies like “please,” “thank you,” and “I’m sorry”. People need to hear them.
- Build trust by opening up first, being consistent, and keeping your promises.
- Anger exists for a reason. Use it for a purpose rather than letting it control you.
- When you sense a conversation is broken, observe it aloud with a neutral statement like “This is getting hard” or “This has gotten a little awkward.”
Join the next Growth Plan Workshop where we’ll spend an hour talking about Emotional Intelligence in small business. You can improve your EQ plus walk away with an operating plan for 2022.
Register for the Jan 6 Growth Plan Workshop and walk away with your 2022 plan all on a single sheet of paper. In this 6-hour group setting with other small business owners and leaders, our coaches will spend one-on-one time with you, ask you the right questions, and give you the advice you need to walk away with a completed Single Sheet Business Plan and a Quarterly Action Plan to jumpstart it.
Register here for the next Growth Plan Workshop.
Thur., Jan 6, 2022, 9 – 4 pm
Holiday Inn Indianapolis Airport, 8555 Stansted Dr, Indianapolis, IN 46241
Get a detailed plan in place for 2022 and improve your EQ… your people and your customers will be amazed, energized, and more loyal than ever.